One of the writinginsideVT agreements we writers ascribe to weekly is…”this is a sacred circle, and we are all equal within it.”  As a result, we facilitators write vulnerably about our lives, loves and struggles too.   Each participant’s willingness to be real, honest and imperfect creates a holy safety in which our questions and insights can blossom.

Here’s a “fast-write” I penned in the circle last week about the changing nature of my God:  

Santa-God

with shimmering beard

perched at pearly gates

before heaven’s entrance,

I wholeheartedly release

your false guise.

Conditional, patriarchal,

unbending in your demand

for me to be a “good girl.”

What a miniscule vision

to be saddled with.

As if being “nice” and

“perfect” were Godly aims…

I now know not.

It is liberating to give oneself

permission to be human –

fallible, tempted, hungry, lonely.

I say this not to justify

any of my royal screw-ups

in this life.

I make no excuses

for us wayward soldiers.

No.  God, the Divine,

the All That Is—

whatever the name claimed,

is deeply embedded in humanity

and all things beating.

This spark of love

emanates from the Sun,

the daffodil,

the dirty, nearly naked man

panning on the roadside.

The Source of Life is not divorced

from me, from anyone.

Can I release the man-made images

and limiting notions of

being better, happier,

of trying harder,

and surrender into peaceful knowing

that I am loved and blessed,

held as is,

and no paybacks are required.