Our ‘inside’ writing circle was brimming last evening with 10 writers–three of them first-time participants! Amidst laughter and tears, we wrote about experiencing birthdays ‘inside’ and the pain of missing the birthdays of children and loved ones on the ‘outside.’ Here’s a poignant piece by JL:
I will celebrate my birthday inside this year,
inside concrete walls painted pastel, egg-shell colors.
I will open no presents and blow out no candles.
In fact, I will most probably choose to let the day pass
like any other.
But I will celebrate because I know,
I know that past the covered windows,
the fence with razor wire,
past the locked doors and steel cages,
I am not alone.
I will close my eyes and picture the faces
that I know will take a moment on this day
to send their love through a thought,
a spark, a desire
And it is then that I will celebrate.
Images held, lips curved upward,
a small laugh followed by a gentle tear.
I will be boundless right here
within these walls.
So on this (birth)day, when you see me
walking down the hall,
mop in hand, broom to sweep,
but it looks something different,
like I’m not here…
Don’t you see?
I’m not here at all, I am finally free,
because he, she, and he are on the outside
blowing candles out for me.